Tuesday, July 08, 2008

Pet Ownership - Really?

So the AP, with their McCain leg-humping version of objectivity, has a howler up today: Pet owners, it seems, are more likely to vote for McCain because he owns pets, while Obama is "petless."

Good lord.

Look, I have a dog, who I adopted from the humane society. I'm an animal lover by nature (although cows don't count, PETA members... I love animals, but I love steak more.)

But if you're seriously basing any part of your vote for President of the United States on whether or not he has a fucking bull terrier? Do me a favor... write your will leaving everything to Senator Fluffykins, your 6-year-old Lhasa Apso, go in the garage, close up all the vents and start up your car. All dogs go to heaven, so you'll have plenty of company, and those of us who vote based on actual issues can decide the Presidency instead.

Oh, and AP? If you ever call me with a poll about my views on the candidates' pet-ownership, or golf scores, or music tastes, or whatever other pointless bullshit you can come up with, I'm going to laugh at you, call you four, maybe six, of George Carlin's seven words, and then hang up on you.

Edit: Apparently this is a, let's say, unusual interpretation of this poll. Which makes me slightly less depressed about American voters, and slightly more depressed about the state of pollsters and journalism in this country.

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