So early in the year, I started sharing headlines that I thought were funny and saying "Contender for headline of the year." A friend wondered if I was actually keeping track... so I did.
So... presented for your approval, the contenders for headline of the year 2014. If I do this again next year, I'll probably leave Gawker headlines out, since those are purposefully exaggerated for linkbait purposes. The Guardian from the UK might also be too good at this.
As for what caught my eyes (and the eyes of others)? Sex, genitals, murder through unusual means, bestiality, drugs and unusual uses for animals.
My favorite? I still have to go with the very first one, which is the last one on the list.
Husband arrested for attacking his pregnant wife with a McChicken sandwich because "he doesn't like them"
Snake Thrown in Tim Horton's after diced onion dispute
"Cannibal" Eats Woman and then dies after being tasered in Welsh Hotel
Male SF startup promises to make women's vaginas smell like ripe peaches
Nude man falls through ceiling at Logan, assaults bystander
Nervous Chinese Officials Search Pigeon Anuses for Bombs
Teletubby Breaks Into Home, Dumps Chinese Food In Purse, Leaves
Farrah Abraham Dressed Up As Frozen Elsa to Sell Molds of Her Asshole
Polygamist women dressed 'like ninjas' attack home of witness in Utah sex assault case
Nude Beach Blow Job Jet Ski Fight Leads to Wife's Death
Kid Rock subpoenaed to produce glass dildo as evidence in Insane Clown Posse lawsuit
Chubby Checker, HP settle lawsuit over penis-measuring app
American Exchange Student Pulled out of Giant German Vagina
Captain America Arrested for sending dick pics to teenage girl
High Elf High on Acid Attacks Woman's BMW with a sword
Woman killed with banjos
Topless Florida Woman Destroys McDonalds, Stops To Eat Ice Cream
Police Cite Texas Man In Banana Costume With AK-47 Across His Back
Norwegian Mass Murderer Refuses to Eat Until Prison Upgrades His Playstation Console
Man Covered in Jelly Had Sex With Cow While Friend Recorded It
German Barn Explosion Caused by 90 Farting Cows
Woman Pulls Gun from Vagina After Dispute Over Space Aliens: Cops